One of the highlights of my trip to Qinghai happened at the very end - the opportunity to visit a local orphanage. I've read stories about orphanages in southern China so my head was already filled with heart-wrenching visuals of what I thought I would see. Instead I saw the opposite - upon arrival a bright flower garden filled with snap dragons and sunflowers greeted us as we approached a large, white building. As we passed through the building's entrance, paper cut-outs of smiling animals and flowers in every color of the rainbow were splashed against the walls, creating a feeling of happiness and safety. The reason that this orphanage was built was because the orphans were previously housed in a nearby building which also served as a senior citizens home and mental institution. Realizing that this was not a suitable environment from growing children, a joint initiative was created to build this orphanage between a Hong Kong Christian organization and the Qinghai government.
To provide some context, this orphanage houses around 150 children, of which 95% have some sort of mental and/or physical disability and the remaining 5% are healthy children. Most children were abandoned by their parents and some as young as 5 years old were found wandering the streets on their own. As street children are susceptible to being taken in by gangs, the police or social workers will bring the children to the orphanage. About 1-2 children get adopted each month but my guess is that the healthy 5% of children are the ones to go first.
On our tour of the building's five floors we were greeted by children from newborn to early teens. There were children everywhere - sitting in wheelchairs or stools in the hallways, sleeping in baby chairs, running around, or playing in the rooms. There were even some children I saw sitting in the corners with their hands and legs bound with fabric, rocking and forth, unable to move or say anything. When we inquired what was going on, the nurse replied that these children were being disciplined for their naughty behaviour. It was a hard sight to see. I saw another boy holding a balloon of China's favorite cartoon lamb, Mei Yang-Yang, and strapped to a vertical board as part of his daily one-hour lesson to learn to stand. This child, along with the 15 others in the room, had a severe mental disability which prevented him from talking, standing, or performing basic human functions. Although many kids could not speak due to their mental disabilities the social worker said that the kids could hear us. Using my limited Chinese and English I spoke to a few children and was able to see their eyes move and smiles, and they also reached for our hands. Between 4:30 to 5:30 is the children's dinner so we were able to help feed them.
I spent the most time with this boy who appeared to be 5 years old. He was confined to a wheelchair, could not speak, and had limited body movements with his head and hands. I spoke to him and held his hand, wheeled him around to different windows and explained what I saw outside, freshened him up with a clean towel, gave him a toy car to hold onto, and shook some musical bells with him. As I spent time with this boy, amidst the room of 10 other similar children, I was saddened by thoughts that it is highly unlikely that he will ever escape this lifestyle. It is also highly unlikely that he will get the hugs, smiles, and attention that he, and every child, rightfully deserves from his or her parents/caregivers. This boy was so precious and no amount of hugs I gave him that day would ever be enough for his lifetime ahead.
My heart was completely broken into two as our time came to say goodbye..So what happens next? What can I do about the heartache that has grown within me?
